The best decision I have ever made. No hyperboly to date – laser eye surgery. Unloading the dishwasher, going for a boogie, a run, a downward dog. An annoying plus one – glasses.

Sure, glasses look cool but they weren’t cool for me all the time.

I had heard about laser eye surgery, hey everyone has, those ads on the tube for one eye for £300, they always sounded scary. But I thought as a true investigative journalist, I would sort the fearmongering from the reality.

digital eye

Everyone is nervous about their eyes, so I went for the best. Mr Dr Ali Mearza on Wimpole Street . He’s calm, warm and his waiting room has free diet coke (that gets an extra five stars in my book).

I decided to bite the bullet and go for it.30 million people worldwide have had the procedure. It is the most common voluntary medical procedure that patients choose to have.

I am going to run through the procedure briefly, yes it feels weird, it’s scary (I took a Valium) but it is 15 minutes long. I mean how long would you queue for your miso glazed dumpling at a new popup? When it is all over, he points at the clock on the wall. I can read it.

Ali operating-1

What follows is a couple of hours of the sensation that my eye is a sandpit filled with little people cutting onions.I go home looking like a very much off duty celebrity with my sunglasses on. A couple of hours later I wake up. And wow do I see the roses. That video where someone can hear for the first time, I can’t quite guarantee my reaction was that, but it’s all that clichéd, crazy phrases. Life changing, exciting, thrilling.

I woke up and had 20:20 vision, no wait 20:16 (that’s even better). See you later four eyes.